Yeah Well

they killed saddam and eye don’t give a shit

they fucking put a rope around his neck wild fucking west put him on a horse tied his hands behind his back slapped that horse right on the ass no wait hang on yeah they threw a rope around a big old magnolia limb hauled his brown ass up by the throat tarred the evil cocksucker caught him on fire burn sand nigger burn watched him dangle shake shiver no wait hang on yeah they tied his hands behind his back tied big old long rope around his feet the other end to the bumper one of them toyota four by fours haul ass across the scrub slung his scrawny ass sliding atop natural sandpaper shredding skin to meat no wait hang on ah fuck eye don’t care eye don’t give a flying fuck

they fucking put a rope around his neck wild fucking west eye think they talked about his momma eye think they talked about his wife his kids eye think they talked about his flaccid dick eye think they talked about the flatulent fearful smell drifting from his pants eye think they spit on him taunted him told him he was going to hell he was an evil evil man he was going to hell what the fuck what the hell what the fuck were we thinking

they killed saddam and eye don’t give a fuck

we sent our army all the way over across the water hey these boys are special not only are they you ess soldiers they are volunteers they love their country so much they went down to the local recruiting station army navy air force marine coast fucking guard whatever they went down on their own signed that piece of paper put on the uniform picked up a gun they be fucking special

eye mean they could have just as easily went over to the local wall mart got themselves a good job yeah no benefits yeah can’t afford to pay rent eat drive this bomb that detroit sells sucks gas like my eleventh grade girlfriend deep and nonstop yeah ain’t no future after the christmas return season anyway eye mean they could have just as easily stayed at home got themselves a good job at wall mart nope not our boys not our boys in green tan whatever the fuck they wear

they be so down with cammo bay bee

nope not our boys they didn’t just settle for the good job no baby these boys these you ess army navy airforce marines coast fucking guard they went to eye rack under their own

voe lishun

ain’t that a beautiful thing ain’t life a lovely thing ain’t it ain’it me and my man pete and my man vee and my man jay cee and my man alpo and my man bondage and my man guido and my new man dug and his brother the hipster bondage he looked at the hipster an older hipster at that been a hipster all his life eye bet eye imagine even wore the fucking prerequisite black turtleneck black beret fucking frog hipster bondage he looked at hipster he said so when you go to your hipster party i want you to do me a favor i want you to find something out for me i want you to ask poll maybe is the better verb infinitive form mister hipster can you ask your other hipster friends playing in all their hipster games can you ask them

what is hip

and get back to me with the answer i am really rather curious of course the obvious follow up question just has to be stands to reason you must also ask them

what is not hip

i am just so curious thanks bondage yeah he just wanted to know innocent quest don’t you know five or six bourbons into the evening specs don’t you know specs in the alley it’s a drinking bar not much of a pick up bar not much of a cocktail lounge no specs yeah it’s just a plain old drinking bar it ain’t like johnson’s barbecue down off bayview you know where the sign just says

don’t need no teeth to eat my meat

it an’t like johnsons maybe belongs in the same genus or something genetically similar spec’s it’s just a plain old drinking bar hadn’t been there in a while my man pete he says the other day we got to go out during the holidays you know just kind of blow one out eye say yeah they fucking hung the guy

they went and sent our boys girls in uniform all the over to coo wait bunches and bunches of ‘em put ‘em on ships put ‘em in tanks put ‘em in hummers put ‘em in jeeps and donkey carts and little red wagons and big wheels someone said go they bombed the shit out of everything our boys girls in uniforms they stormed all over creation went into bagged dad fucked ‘em up good ran their president into a hole dragged him out of the hole took pictures of him looking like he’d been in a hole put him in a jail cell put a rope round his neck hung his evil self

goddamn eye feel the righteous glow of justice goddamn it feel good and well just plain old

righteous

only way to describe it guido got hit by a cab not the other night the other night he didn’t get hit by a cab but about a year or so ago guido got hit by a cab threw him up and over and onto an examiner newspaper box he guido he had been drinking with jay cee at specs in the alley funny because eye’m hearing this story for the first time ever me jay cee vee pete we’re out in the alley smoking hand rolled cigarettes

bally shag baby

jay cee telling the story he’s three four pints of anchor steam into the night jay cee he says one moment we’re sitting at the bar having a pint the next i look up and gueeds is gone i walk up the sidewalk looking for him all i see is blood all over this examiner box but i don’t see no guido i don’t see no ambulance i don’t see no policemen nothing i see guido the next morning at the club going for a swim notice a big old lump coming out of guido’s speedo i say guido what the fuck

we fucking went over to another country we dragged their president into the streets and we killed him that’s what we did goddamn eye feel righteous eye feel so righteous eye just got to

howl

i saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness starving hysterical naked dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn looking for an angry fix

doctor at the club she come over she sees the lump in the speedo she just yanks them down guido has a fucking tampon sticking out of a huge fucking wound on his callipygian cleft she says where the fuck you going guido he says i’m fucking going swimming she says not like that had him bend over the bar she sewed his ass up right then and there guido got his swim in turns out guido fell on that examiner box

right on the corner

punctured a fucking hole in his butt cheek bled like a stuck pig all over the place he hopped onto bart went home to walnut fucking creek looked into his medicine cabinet only thing he could find were a couple of tampons an old girlfriend had left behind he plugged up the hole went to bed simple as that guido he’s standing there with us in the alley by now he says hey

didn’t have health insurance

what the fuck i’m gonna do what the fuck we all gonna do we went fucking sent our boys in green over to eye rack said fuck ‘em up good while you’re at it grab that fucking saddam let’s hang the cocksucker let’s drive right up kill ‘em all fucking sand niggers

jay cee bondage they each got divorce separation stories jay cee he says don’t go in front of a judge they’re all fucking lesbians bondage he says aw man it’s fucked up i haven’t had sex in six years me eye nodded eye tried to tell them eye ain’t married to their crazy wives eye may have my own crazy wife but she ain’t anywhere near as crazy as their crazy wives eye mean eye’m still crazy about my crazy wife they fucking hate their crazy wives that’s for one thing the other thing they’re both kind of crazy themselves eye mean look at ‘em what the fuck’s up with that them giving advice fuck

eye love them anyway hell eye might even have sex with jay cee he’s kind of cute might even give him a reach around while eye’m fucking him in the ass hell eye love them anyway they only tell me shit because they love me and because

they got crazy wives

eye just drank more port cheap fucking port the kind of port where you wake up the next morning feeling like you been licking thousands of stinky smelly portoguese feet all through the night eye smoked a cigarette and a bowl for every glass of port eye drank eye wonder if they let saddam have a joint a drink a cigarette before they put a fucking rope around his neck hung his brown aa rabbit ass eye mean hell

saddam he was an evil man

gassed all them people killed all them people fucked them up ends justifies the means saddam he was an evil man we had to kill him even if we had to kill six hundred thousand poor unfortunate cocksuckers to get to him

goddamn eye do indeed feel righteous

some drunk walked up to us lit a joint said he was the god son of key kesey wrote a screenplay for a movie kesey was going to star in the movie eye asked eye said so isn’t kesey dead the drunk eye guess he’s about my age the drunk he says yeah that’s why we can’t make the movie now young dude decked out in cal ware hat jersey wristbands cal bears go he runs up stumbles up really ducks behind us looks over pete’s shoulder pete he goes so young dude you running from the police young dude he says

no man just my cabbie

didn’t want to pay my fare only had enough money to either buy a couple of beers or pay my cab fare eye elected to give my money to specs we all nodded and murmured approval of a very wise decision made by someone so young twas truly a miraculous thing eye gave him my tobacco pouch he wanted to roll a cigarette said dude i’m so good at rolling these things he fucked up the first four until eye took it back rolled him one lit it for him

pete and eye left walked down through china town after midnight place was kind of deserted the sidewalks empty only hours earlier they had been teeming with people animals in cages dead fish pig parts vegetables and lots of cheap expensive jade jewelry twelve year old girls all of whom had had visits from the foot binder we walked down through the stockton tunnel up onto union square sat beneath the big christmas tree gazed at the all the store lights macy’s saks the saint francis nike levi’s coach eye’ll take one of each we sat on a bench rolled a cigarette smoked a couple of bowls talked about nothing talked about shit

we didn’t talk about saddam at all we didn’t say one fucking word about saddam we didn’t give a shit about saddam we didn’t give a fuck about saddam

saddam was an evil man eye don’t give a shit

president bush george dubya bush he mourned the death of the three thousandth you ess soldier in eye rack the white house said on sunday but cautioned war weary americans that no quick end was in sight to the fight against terrorism

saddam was an evil man and eye don’t give a shit

the president believes that every life is precious and grieves for each one that is lost said white house spokesman scott stanzel he will ensure their sacrifice was not made in vain by the way eye looked it up in vain in the american heritage dictionary eye looked up in vain it means

without success

our boys their sacrifice was not made without success saddam was an evil man and eye don’t give a shit eye don’t give a fuck me and pete we walked up geary street up through the upper edge of the tenderloin walked past the pine crest restaurant serves up a mean bacon and eggs walked past the clift hotel got rooms made for fine fucking walked past some dive bars walked past some people sitting up against the building walls walked past a couple of crack hookers walked past corner store selling cigars eye caught a cab at van ness driven by the crazy african fucker he didn’t drive in vain pete he walked home through the castro he’s tough that way built for endurance me eye was drunk

cheap port bally shag evil surrounds us happy new year and all that